By Comrade Owolabi Aleshinloye OwoSports July 13th, 2025
Stop Expecting Loyalty From People Who Don’t Even Know What Loyalty Means
In today’s fast paced world of fleeting relationships and self-interest, loyalty is becoming increasingly rare. We often find ourselves hurt or betrayed, not necessarily because others are cruel, but because we expect loyalty from people who have no idea what it truly means. This article explores why we must stop placing such expectations on the wrong people, and how to protect our peace in the process.
Let’s begin by asking ourselves some salient questions and providing practical answers!
What Does Loyalty Really Mean?
Loyalty isn’t just about being physically present. It’s about emotional commitment. It’s sticking with someone not only when it’s convenient but especially when it’s hard. Loyalty means:
• Defending someone in their absence
• Keeping confidences private
• Standing by someone through challenges
• Being consistent in words and actions
But here’s the harsh reality: not everyone understands this. Some see relationships as transactions. Others only stay close when they benefit. If loyalty isn’t in their nature, expecting it from them is a guaranteed recipe for disappointment.
Why You Keep Getting Hurt
- You Assume Everyone Thinks Like You.
You value loyalty, so you expect it in return. But not everyone has the same moral compass. Some people prioritize convenience, popularity, or self-interest over commitment.
- You Ignore Red Flags
Maybe they’ve talked badly about friends behind their backs, or they vanished when you needed them most. Often, the signs are there, you just chose to overlook them.
- You Overestimate the Relationship
Just because someone shares laughs, secrets, or goals with you doesn’t mean they’ll stay loyal when times get tough. True loyalty is proven in silence, not just spoken in words.
How to Identify the Disloyal
• They only come around when things are going well.
• They gossip or betray your trust behind your back.
• They show support publicly but compete privately.
• They expect loyalty from you—but rarely give it.
These are not your people. These are people who like the idea of being close to you, but aren’t invested in staying by your side when it costs them something.
The Emotional Cost of Expecting Too Much
The more you expect loyalty from the wrong people, the more drained and resentful you become. You start questioning your worth, your judgment, and even your ability to trust. The problem isn’t your standard, it’s who you’re applying it to.
Let this be your turning point.
How to Protect Your Peace
- Observe Patterns, Not Promises:
Words mean nothing without consistent action. Trust people based on their patterns, not their potential.
- Set Boundaries:
You don’t have to cut people off. But you do need to stop giving them full access to your trust, time, and energy.
- Choose Character Over Chemistry:
Just because you click with someone doesn’t mean they have character. Invest in relationships where values align, not just vibes.
- Don’t Try to Teach Loyalty:
Loyalty is not something you teach, it’s something you see. If you have to constantly remind someone to be loyal, they’re not truly loyal.
Final Thoughts And Practicable Advice!
Stop expecting loyalty from people who don’t even know what loyalty means. It’s not your job to educate or fix them. It’s your job to protect your peace, your heart, and your energy.
Start investing in people who show up without being asked, defend you without being told, and stay even when it’s easier to walk away.
Because loyalty isn’t a request, it’s a reflection of someone’s soul.
