Nigerian singer Omawumi has dismissed the growing narrative that modern relationships are more transactional than in the past, insisting instead that only the form of exchange between partners has changed over time.
Speaking on a Pulse podcast, the singer explained that expectations in relationships have always existed, particularly among women, but have evolved alongside changing lifestyles and social trends.
She drew a comparison between earlier forms of courtship and today’s dating culture, noting that what once involved simple gestures like buying ice cream or popcorn has now shifted to more expensive expectations.
“I disagree because we women have had long throat since the beginning of time… but our transactional was different,” she said. “Back then, it was ice cream and popcorn. But now, it’s an iPhone.”
Omawumi argued that the word “transactional” is often misunderstood and that mutual exchange is a natural part of relationships. According to her, effort and reciprocity have always been present in dating dynamics.
She also noted that she consciously matches the energy she receives in relationships, especially when a partner shows affection through gifts or effort.
“If I’m dating a man who gives me presents, I always strive to equal that energy,” she said, adding that encouragement of mutual effort is important when two people are interested in each other.
The singer further addressed perceptions that women only receive in relationships while their contributions are overlooked. She argued that this imbalance is often exaggerated in public discourse.
Omawumi also pointed out that some men tend to pursue what she described as “shiny objects,” sometimes investing heavily in the early stages of attraction.
Ultimately, she identified inconsistency as a major challenge in modern relationships, stressing that effort often declines once initial interest is secured.
“And once you’ve finished obtaining it, you’ll need to cut back on all the effort you were doing earlier… No, you must maintain your energy,” she said.
